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Lisa, became known as the Queen of Captions.
Dressed to the nines in designer duds and wearing an ENORMOUS diamond ring, she was rich blood, for our magazine. I don’t know what her background was, but her father’s toast at her wedding was “Remember the three most important things in life - Money, Money and Money.” She was married to a very successful stockbroker she called “her future ex,” long before the idea of a starter marriage was conceivable. They had a maid, a driver, a personal trainer and a chef in the early 80s long before it was common.
I received a thank you note from Lisa, after I mentioned [sarcastically and in jest] that she might want to consider hiring the helicopter service that ran from the Water Club to the Hamptons, as she despised the time it took her to get to their summer house in hubby’s limo.
To be honest, I could never figure out what she was doing working at all, let alone at our magazine. But she was fascinating in way a rare, exotic bird would be among a flock of pigeons.
She came to work late one morning in the third or fourth week — she’d pulled out a drawer too far and dropped it on the floor, she wasn’t sure i she should clean it up or leave it for the maid. She, sauntered into our production meeting where she slid into a chair on the far side of the room and with a sigh, started thumbing through a copy of Italian Vogue.
When her project came up, an advertorial on Indonesia, all eyes turned to her — but she was intently studying the magazine. Her boss cleared her throat. Nothing. Denise, seated beside Lisa, nudged her. She looked up, completely non-plussed and asked “Oh, I’m sorry, were you asking something? I wasn’t paying the least bit of attention.” I liked her bravado. And she got away with behavior no one could have.
Lisa became famous for balking at writing captions - sure she provided text for her projects, (which were written by a pool of outside writers primarily hired by her boss), but she couldn’t be bothered to write captions for any of the images in the piece. On several occasions, frustrated that a job was “stuck,” members of the art department would write the captions themselves then highlight them for her approval.
On one occasion Steve, an art director, wrote joke captions which sadly, no one caught before the piece went to press. They were funny but not flattering in nature, and were published, to the horror of the company and the country sponsoring the report, as this privilege ran them around $300K. The company ate the cost, ran a retraction and apology, and then reprinted the piece at cost.
Immediately, there was a meeting set-up to discuss this epic fail and to ensure that it never happened again. Rumor was that heads were going to roll, but in truth the Editorial Director took the brunt of the blame — while for Lisa and Steve — both favorites on the staff — it was a mild slap on the wrist.
That’s how it was with Lisa, she didn’t need the job, so I think the company felt lucky to have her, plus she dressed up the joint and that went a long way back then. I wonder where she is now, what she’s up to.
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